The glory that is THE FRIDAY POLE!

Last Tuesday (November 8th, 2011) I took an empty tube from a roll of plotter paper and wrote the word “Friday” all over it in about 30 languages (Thanks, Google Translate). Thus, the “Friday Pole” was born. Then I threaded ethernet cable through it, tied the ends together, and wore it around the office last Friday to celebrate Friday. Now whenever Friday rolls around, I have a way to celebrate.

Perks of the pole:

1. Energy Saved: I can put Post-It notes on the end and use the pole to reach people 42″ sooner than I normally would.
2. Pretend it is a quiver and then shoot invisible arrows around the office all afternoon.
3. Herald the good news that Friday has arrived.

It looks like this:

ENHANCE!

ENHANCE!

Celebrating Friday doesn’t get enhanced by cardboard much better than this. Yesterday I saw 3 border collies in one day, which was awesome. If I could transpose those events to today, that would make for an better Friday, but instead it just made for a better Thursday.

Most of my coworkers understand the Friday pole (and during the week ask about its pending appearance). But it seems to create confusion as well:

Person: “What is that?”
Me: “The Friday Pole.”
Person: “What is that?”
Me: “A pole that I wrote the ‘Friday’ all over in multiple languages.”
Person: “Why?”
Me: “So that everyone will know it is Friday.”
Person: *Very puzzled look*
Me: “I don’t know how else to explain it.”

I am always afraid that when the weekend arrives I’ll find myself with nothing to do. But then a pile of events always slides in, in the same manner Indian Jones always dives under a closing door of stone at the last possible moment. This is partially why I have such a hell of a time keeping a consistently updated blog.

As of last Friday morning not much had been planned for the weekend. Then in the afternoon a friend offered us leftover tickets to see the Scottish band “We Were Promised Jet Packs” play at a conveniently located venue that is a 90-second walk from the apartment.

Saturday morning found us jumping in a BMW 328i (hurray for Zipcar!) and, at a completely legal speed, zipping across the Bay Bridge to Alameda for a birthday brunch for the wife of my comedic soulmate. Stomachs filled with homemade French toast, quiche, and sausage, and arms weary from holding a 4 month old, we headed for Concord to enjoy our friends’ newly renovated fireplace.

Being too warm to use the fireplace, we sat outside and petted the neighbor’s whorishly friendly cat. Then to see “Puss n’ Boots”. We weren’t dying to see the movie, but little else is playing. As I entered the theater the ticket taker questioned my choice of movies and offered:

“If you like smoking pot, see Harold and Kumar. Otherwise see Immortals.”

After the quite uninteresting movie finished, we headed to Barnes and Noble. All of the chain bookstores in SF have closed, and being in a gigantic bookstore is once again a coveted moment. As I picked up each book, noticed the steep price, and thought “I should really buy this, on Amazon”, I drifted towards the overpriced DVD and Bluray section.

I’ve been meaning to get Avatar on Bluray. The manager found the only remaining copy– the overpriced, extended, gazillion dollar version– behind the counter. He offered to ring it up when my eyes saw it: The Complete Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman’ box set on DVD.

For a moment I debated having him ring up Avatar, only to interrupt him with urgency and say:

“Wait, no! What is that? Is that Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman? Forget Avatar. I NEED Quinn.”

Purchasing and then returning the set the following day would have been worth it just to give the manager an odd story to tell for the following month.

After that, we headed to Fairfield to see Laura’s parents, who are spending the week in Napa tasting the sweet victor that is man’s domination over grapevines.

Sunday started early with a trip to Church. Followed by a long, enjoyable walk to the SF MOMA. On the way we stopped in an Arabic supermarket and then at Honey Honey for the best crepes in the city, before arriving at the MOMA to renew our membership and wandering around aimlessly for an hour. After that, we stopped for cream puffs at Beard Papa and headed home.

At this point, it is only 2pm on Sunday.

I started watching Avatar, which I’ve not seen since theater. I’d completely forgotten how absolutely gorgeous that movie is, especially on a perfectly color balanced HD TV. In fact, it looks better on my TV than it did in theater. And I can claim this because I saw all three versions of the movie in theater (non-digital, digital non-3d, and digital 3d).

Next I read Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for a bit and finally found time to rest.

And that is what my typical weekend tends to look like. For some reason I feel like I never do anything, but when I stop and look back at it, I definitely don’t waste more than a few moments during a weekend.

Monday a new guy named Pedro joined our IT team. He works for our New York City office, and yesterday afternoon he had his first team phone call with us. About sixty seconds in to the call our boss Chris had to take another call for a moment.

Chris: “Everyone is on the line. I won’t take the time to introduce the entire team over the phone. But I will introduce Pedro… [brief intro]… Sorry guys. I’ve got to take another call for a moment. Talk amongst yourselves.”

I couldn’t let the moment pass with normal banter when there a perfect opportunity to completely confuse Pedro existed. Aside from our boss and his office mate, he hasn’t had real interactions with the rest of us, aside from phone interviews, so he had no idea what to expect.

Me (in a very monotone, uninspired, dry voice): “Welcome to the team. We’re……….. really ….. awesome.”

*Some laughter from the rest of the line.*

Me (super dry): “Do you like Celine Dion?”

I love it. His first chance to interact with the team, and the first question asked is whether he likes Celine Dion. He obviously wanted to make a good impression and definitely doesn’t care for Celine Dion, but he didn’t want to say that because Celine seems to be important to our team for some reason. He then proceeded to spend the next several sentences politely saying he doesn’t like her music.

Pedro: “… so I don’t always like every performer or artist, but I do listen to some of every genre…”

Me (interrupting him): “So you’re okay with New Age Ska?”

Pedro (highly baffled and confused): “What?”

At that point, as a team we lost it and couldn’t keep it up any more. We just died laughing.

Chris: “Okay, I am back. We’re just going to move past the current conversation.”

After I settled down at my desk this morning…

Me: “Eric, have you ever had one of those days where you just wake up and can’t stop thinking about Celine Dion.”

Eric: “Never.”

Me: “Yea. Me too…. Just curious.”

After Hunter arrived and settled down…

Me: “Eric has never had one of those days where you wake up thinking about Celine Dion.”

Hunter: “Wow. How in the world?”

We both turn and stare at Eric until he looks up…

Eric: “What? No. No, I haven’t.”

Me: “She is a Canadian SUPER STAR — basically, the god of Canada, Eric.”