Today I voted because they gave out free stickers and I had nothing better to do (that latter is a joke). My favorite elections are Presidential elections, because Ben and Jerry's gives you a free ice cream if you voted. I live within walking distance of three Ben and Jerry's. Even better, the stores are on the same street, and the distance between one store and the next is the same amount of time it takes to eat one ice cream cone. That means every time I vote for a President, I get three ice creams. Holy crap, my life rocks. Let's examine that further and appreciate it for a moment...

Vote = Ice Cream + Ice Cream + Ice Cream + a sticker

Today Californians were given the opportunity to legalize marijuana at the state level. I've never smoked pot. I'm not interested in smoking pot. I don't care if other people smoke pot. I am not bothered if others smoke pot. But I also don't feel an overwhelming need to legalize it (for several reasons I won't get in to right now), so I voted no. Besides, it is fun to tinker with my friends who do smoke pot.

Now, a slightly more serious shift. There needs to be a law that regulates how many pieces and stipulations a proposition on the ballot can have. For example, the following two items were separate ballot measures in SF:

• Prop L - Shall the City amend its Police Code to prohibit sitting or lying on a public sidewalk in San Francisco between 7 a.m. and 11 p.m., with certain exceptions?
• Prop M - Shall the City require the city require the Police Commission to adopt a written community policing policy, require the Chief of Police to establish a comprehensive Foot Beat Patrol Program, and not amend its Police Code to prohibit sitting or lying on sidewalks.

I am still not sure how I feel about Prop L, but I am definitely for the increased foot patrols and a written policing policy in Prop M. Why can't L only be about sitting/laying on sidewalks and M be only about the policing policy and the patrol program? Now people are going to make an arbitrary stance about the legality of sitting/laying on sidewalks based on factors that have nothing to do with that issue. We might as well be asking...

• Would you like to prohibit getting punched in the face, with certain exceptions?
• Would you like to have $100 and not prohibit getting punched in the face?

In neither case do I actually want punched, but now that I have a choice of $100, why the hell not? Also, some clarification on Prop M about the Foot Beat program would be nice. Is it related to the Foot clan from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? The last thing I want to do is accidentally vote to increase the number of ninjas patrolling the streets. We already have enough bums on the street. Having to deal with bums and ninjas would just be cumbersome.

Finally, let's move on to the most entertaining part of the San Francisco ballot today: San Francisco School Board Candidates. Laura and I voted at the school across the street. When we arrived there were no unoccupied voting booths, and we had the option to wait or to vote in a "less confidential space," which means "Just find a spot and vote." So we took our ballots over to a corner of the room and started filling them out. This was fun because it meant we could whisper silly comments to each other. We both started laughing when we came across the following name at the same time:

• Omar Khalif - Parent / Community Organizer
• Margaret Brodkin - Education Non-Profit Director
• Bill Barnes - Education Policy Aide
• Starchild - Erotic Service Provider
• ... <a bunch of other boring people>

Until that moment, I had never laughed out loud while casting a vote. After we turned in our ballots, Laura informed me that Starchild is a bisexual sex worker who runs each election for the Libertarian party. We Googled him at home and found this great quote from an article about a FAKE election the local schools have, where Starchild was the top pick for school board candidates:

Starchild, who is the Libertarian Party of San Francisco’s outreach director, also polled first in the YouthVote when he previously ran for San Francisco Board of Supervisors. “I’m delighted and honored that San Francisco high school students once again made a pro-freedom, Libertarian candidate and erotic service provider their first choice, to represent them on the body that controls the city’s government-run schools,” he said.

"More good ideas have died because of other good ideas."

My biggest problem is that I am interested in too many good ideas at once. I always come up with a new ideas and start to wrap myself up in it. Then a week or two later I am distracted by another new idea, and the process starts over. Pretty soon I am surrounded by great ideas, but none of them ever come to fruition. (This is especially true with video games. Just in the apartment I have a DS, an X-Box 360, a PS2, and a PS3. You know how many games I can potentially play? I always play about 80% through before I'm distracted by another game.)

I'm starting a new plan where I pick a project and then work on it for 2 hours a day until I've reached 60 hours. For most projects, 60 hours is more than enough time to complete them, and if it isn't completed it will at least be very well developed at that point. Next I need to just pick one project and start with it. The first will most likely be a board game I've worked on from time to time over the last few years, followed by some Lego Mindstorm NXT projects.

The only thing I can work on aside from the assigned project is Rosetta stone. I'm aiming for 20 to 30 minutes a day.

And it isn't uncommon for me to find myself in front of the computer doing nothing useful on it. Now when I sit down, I have to sit down with a purpose, and when the purpose is over, my time on the computer is over. This way I avoid surfing reddit.com for hours when I could be working on a project or Rosetta stone. For instance, this morning it was "Write a new blog." And now that I'm done with that it is time to finish laundry, eat lunch, and spend the day at the MOMA.

While watching The Big Bang Theory, I saw and recorded this commercial for purposes of humor. It honestly sounds like she says "Face Breast Cancer". This is now my favorite new imaginary disease. Previously it was the imaginary disease was Unicornucopia Syndrome, but that was until I discovered this gem of a poor copywriting choice.

(No, I do not believe cancer is funny. Yes, I know what she is actually saying. The frogurt is cursed. That is bad.)

A few weeks ago I went and saw Louis CK perform at the Davies Symphony Hall. I have no idea who or what Davies is, but I am pretty sure it has nothing to do with syphilis. Louis was excellent. Even more impressive is that he did a solid 70 minutes if not more, and he didn't repeat anything I'd heard before. He touched on the same subjects as some of his other sets, but he didn't recite them.

Last weekend I went to the Bridge School Benefit and saw the following awesome lineup:

• Grizzly Bear
• Modest Mouse
• Kris Kristofferson
• T Bone Burnett's Speaking Clock Revue, which included: Elvis Costello, Jeff Bridges, Neko Case, Ralph Stanley, Elton John and Leon Russel
• Pearl Jam
• Buffalo Springfield

The Bridge School Benefit is an annual event, and the price can't be beat. Fifty dollars to spend 7 hours outside listening to amazing bands and being allowed to bring in your own picnic is awesome. It drizzled enough throughout the day to make things damp, but the weather didn't come remotely close to ruining the day. I think it made it better, actually. And even with the gray weather, the turn out was more than I've seen the last two years.

Even though Pearl Jam hasn't had a good album in the last 10 years, they still put on a great show. And Modest Mouse blazed through their songs at a high rate of fire and seemed to be trying to break the record for most instrument changes in a single performance. At least once a song, if not more, Isaac Brock changed his instrument.

And Tuesday Laura and I went to the Sufjan Stevens concert at the Paramount in Oakland. Just a few blocks from the Fox Theater, the Paramount is another gorgeous theater that is a throwback to the 1920s. The only thing missing in the lobby were a few flapper girls and a few men with suits and hats.

Sufjan put on a very spirited, a very engaging show. Everything thing about that show was just right - the right level of noise, of lights, of odd videos, of odd art, of the right banter. We got a kick out of watching him dance. Kip, from Napoleon Dynamite, must be his personal choreographer. It was fun to watch because his dancing wasn't good, but he was enjoying himself, and that carried to the crowd. And Sufjan's newest album, the Age of Adz, is excellent. It is a massive shift from the sound of his previous albums, but he did a great job with it. It does take getting used to though.

Know what it takes to see John Lennon? A backhoe.

Imagine that.

100% serious: A month ago I actually witnessed a woman in a toy store trying to return a ball-and-paddle toy that she had taken out of the package. The conversation was great:

Woman: "I'd like to return this."
Clerk: "Why?"
W: "The string is too long and the ball doesn't bounce well enough."
C: "Uh, huh."
W: "I am very accomplished at these things. See." (then she proceeded to demonstrate less coordination than someone with sever rigor mortis)

Bob the Builder inspired Ludacris's lyrics "Different (back)hoes in different area codes."

JCB by Nizlopi is probably the only song about construction vehicles that you can use to successfully set the mood for a romantic situation.

The least romantic song I've ever kissed someone to was most of the Rammstein "Du Hast" album. The music was by coincidence, the kiss was by choice.

I wonder who was the first coyote to bring over Mexican Coca~Cola? There is probably a tree somewhere covered in Coca~Cola boxes (extra points if you got the reference).

I love my new T-Mobile G2 Android phone, but the iPhone is still a more polished user experience.

Life Alert needs an iPad/iPhone application that way you can see exactly where your senior citizen fell over at.

Is there a reason why we need more than one type of pasta noodle? After the first one, it is all redundant. (Same goes for Mexican food. "Mexican food's great, but it's essentially all the same ingredients ... tortilla, cheese, meat, and a vegetables." - Jim Gaffigan)

If you haven't watched "Constantine's Sword" you should. It will remind you how potent a weapon religion can be and that Pope Benedict XVI is trampling some great progress made by Pope John Paul II.

The Avatar movie was awesome, but the toys are beyond lame. I can poop out better ideas for toys. Every kid who loves Avatar must be in depression over how lame the toys are. Even a dreidel is better.

Jewish Jamaicans have dreidelocks.

Trust me. Cows are useless no matter what the salesman says.

There is no point playing Angry Birds past level one. It is the ball-and-paddle or hoop-and-a-stick of video games. On the other hand, if it shuts you up from complaining about the new Gap logo, please keep playing it.

The winner of the Tour de France is really a two fold champion: the world champion of Biking and the world champion of Not Getting Caught Doping. They all do it.

I was the undisputed cartwheel champion at work. Then someone asked me about it, so now I'm the disputed cartwheel champion. (It all went down on Yammer. Yes, on our corporate Yammer page I am listed as "Seth Disputed Cartwheel Champion"

This Friday afternoon is not moving fast enough. I'm sure it has been 4:30pm (remember to always indicate units) for the last 3 hours.

I have a plan. It requires a particle accelerator and two weasels. If you have either component, please let me know ASAP. I'll split the Nobel prize money with you.

That was a busy weekend...

Friday Morning: Dodge Ball

I started my weekend on Friday morning. While most people went to work and waited for the end of the day to arrive, I joined a handful of coworkers at Jackson park for the annual SF creative agency dodge ball tournament (at Jackson park in Potrero hill). From 10am on, we spent the day drinking kegs of beer, gorging on taco truck food, and playing dodge ball. Of course it was followed by going to the bar across the street.

Here is Patrick sporting our Rambo themed shirt: "Heroes never die, they reload."

The tournament was double elimination, and each round was a best 2 out of 3. The first round we dominated, but the second round we were handed a loss by a company called Smart. Then we rallied, dominated the under dog bracket without losing a match, and ended up in the championship game. Interestingly for the championship we had to play Smart again. Since it was double elimination, we needed to beat them in 4 of 7 games, and they only had to beat us in 2 out of 7. And beat us they did. But still, we got a decisive second place.

Friday Evening: Ballet

One of my friends is a ballerino (male ballet dancer) for the Smuin ballet company. So Laura and I headed off to see the start of the ballet season. Thanks to Matt we had incredible seats in the middle of the second row. The troope  performed three pieces:

1. Brahms-Haydn Variation, choreographed by Michael Smuin
2. Oh, Inverted World, choreographed by Trey McIntyre -- The World Premiere
3. BlueGrass/Slyde, choreographed by Michael Smuin

The Brahms bit is what you'd consider a typical and classical looking ballet piece. The Bluegrass/Slyde was enjoyable and fun to watch.

But the second piece, "Oh, Inverted World" by Trey McIntrye. Holy shit. First, it was set to the Shins album, which is already a good sign. Second, the choreography was tailored for the Smuin dancers, which meant they got to show off (The piece didn't exist a month ago. Trey basically made it for Smuin). Third, it was explosive. It caught us off guard. It was fresh, enjoyable, original, and impressive. The program guide stated that Trey is one of the most sought after choreographers in the world, and now I know why. I'd see that particular piece a few more times.

Also, you will never feel more physical inferior than sitting on the second row at a ballet.

Saturday: Flaming Lips at the Fox Theater

The Flaming Lips are one of the best bands to see live, and to see them in the gorgeous Fox Theater (built in 1928) is a treat to envy. You've never seen more intense strobe lights, trippy visuals, as much confetti, or as many large balloons floating over your head. We had general admission tickets and arrived early enough to score great spots where we could drown in music and confetti. Wayne is great and prepped the audience in advance for the severity of the strobes. They also passed out boxes of laser pointers. One person with a laser pointer is irritating. A thousand people with laser pointers is pretty neat.

Here are two videos...

Video 1: Here we're playing with the laser pointers (link)

Video 2: The audio in this is terrible, but you get a good feel for the confetti and lights (link).

Highlight #1 of the Night: the girl who wandered through the crowd all evening saying "I'm on drrrUUUuuuggggS!" She physically accosted everyone as she went to and fro. A dad stood next to us with two teenage kids, and when the drugged out girl crossed his path, she groped her fingers through his head while apologizing.

Highlight #2 of the Night: The Lips always pull people from the crowd to dance on stage. Most people are just normal, typical fans dressed in odd fashion. This time one of the dancers was obviously a stripper by profession. She had a completely toned and sexy body, fairly impossible proportions, and dance moves that were definitively provocative. If you've ever thought "I want to see a stripper", then this girl is who you imagined. For the first five minutes everyone was a bit fixated on her, but she only had five moves, and to tell the truth stripper moves are not the right spirit for a Flaming Lips concert, no matter how hot you might be.

The other dancers were more fun to watch because they were having fun and weren't worried about putting on a show.

Sunday: Pottery and Movies

Laura and I headed to a place called Terra something or other, where we picked out pieces of pottery to paint. Over the week the pieces will be glazed and fired in a kiln, and we can pick them up next weekend. Last time we did this Laura made a butter dish and I made a plate that was a UFO on the bottom and a robot on the top.

This time we each made two pieces. Laura only had time to finish her first piece, a beautiful mug. And I managed to churn out a plate celebrating vegetables and then made the coolest bowl-type thingie you've ever seen...

Laura painting a mug.

My rough sketch of the vegetable celebration.

Carrot and Broccoli (Broccoli was originally meaner looking and modeled after Samuel L. Jackson)

Yes, that is TOTORO!

Following that, we hit up the theater to see Easy A. Yes, we could have seen The Social Network, but we were both in the mood for something more lighthearted. Easy A = Mean Girls + Saved. We thought it was funny. And the parents in the movie definitely stole the show. I really appreciate when movies show families that have a strong home life.

Dear Brain,

Don't get me wrong, you're great and I do appreciate all of the things you do consciously and unconsciously.

But can we keep the chatter about reality, physics, philosophy, space-time, perception, religion, existence, mathematics, netflix queues, or other existential matters to DAYLIGHT HOURS.

I AM TRYING TO GET SOME F!@#$ing SLEEP.

Sincerely,

-Me

ps - Double check that the DVR is set to record 30 Rock, The Office, Community, and The Big Bang.

I love a good wine or beer, but I am not a fan of liquors. If I am going to consume something, I want it to taste good, and to me a 25 year old single malt scotch tastes the same as a scotch made by a two-bit bum who mixed rubbing alcohol with left over cigarette butts. On the other hand, I do like gins and vodkas.

Sometimes people ask weird questions in response to answers. For some reason, whenever I say "I like gin and vodka" someone undoubtedly looks at me and asks "Together?" What the hell, people. I might like to mix some weird tastes but even that is beyond me.

Foods I Hate:

1. Potatoes - Before you ask "What about potato salad or twice-baked potatoes or mashed potatoes," remember it is the ingredient not the recipe I dislike. The problem with your potato recipe is that it contains potato. People are always trying to convert me to liking potatoes, as though they're Mormons and I just opened up my apartment door and invited them in.
2. Beans - They are just tiny potatoes in disguise.
3. Cooked Carrots - Cooking a carrot is like beating a dead horse. Just eat the thing how you found it.
4. Celery - Because it makes every other damn vegetable on the vegetable plate taste like celery. Second, if I want to feel like I flossed, I'll just floss.
5. Peanut Butter - I love peanuts of all sorts, but I dislike peanut butter by itself. The taste is too intense.

Outside of those 4 items, I pretty much will eat anything.

Exceptions to the Rules:

1. French fries are okay, because they're potatoes that have been baptized. But they have to be thin and crisp.
2. Peanut butter plus a sufficient amount of chocolate is acceptable. e.g, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

On a completely separate side note, check out this photograph:

It is almost serene until you realize that they're hundreds of thousands of dead fish that turned up in a Louisiana river *cough* bp *cough*.

Don't worry, all the dead animals will coagulate together and go in to rigamortis. And then we'll be able to just drive up and down the river on our bridges made of fish. Move over cement. The construction material of the future has arrived.

Finally, this is brilliant:

A good rule of thumb for landlords is to be weary of any tenant who appears to be either an evil alien or the inspiration for an evil alien race from an episode of Star Trek. More specifically, an alien from any episode after the original series. You know, the episodes where the special effects gave semblance of a budget. Case in point: this guy from Tulsa, Oklahoma.  Back in July this guy tried to run down his landlord with a 1996 Ford Windstar, or as he probably liked to call it the "Ford Warpstar." (full story here)

If Lieutenant Commander Worf had a threesome with a coloring book and the jewelry counter of a Hot Topic at the local mall, this guy would be the precipitate love child. As if that weren't odd enough, he later on picked up a pink t-shirt. As for the scarring, it is either a sideburns-by-number or he let Amun-Ra belch hieroglyphics on his head.

I'm all for freedom of expression, especially when it serves as a warning to potential instability. On the other hand it is easy to understand why he had all of the tattoos and piercings done. Think about it. He drives a 1996 Ford Windstar. You would do the same thing, because in that situation there are only two ways to prove your manhood and living in Tulsa is not one of them.

Choice #1 - Become the first person to defeat a grizzly bear in a fight while on fire

Or

Choice #2 - Run over your landlord (not that I endorse or promote running landlords over)

I never clean out my Netflix queues. But recently I had to clean out my "Instant Watch" queue because I had hit the maximum of 500 queued movies. I compiled my watched movies in to this nice list for anyone who is interested. An asterisk means don't miss this movie. The scale is: 1 = Bad, 2 = Didn't Really Like It, 3 = Liked it, 4 = Loved It, 5 = Amazing.

My favorite movie from the list is Pan's Labyrinth. Think of it as a dark fairy tale for adults. I don't even think there is another movie in this genre. Runners up would be Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, A Scanner Darkly, and Zombieland.

Documentary or Based on a True Story:

(5) * The Devil Came on Horseback - Now you wish you'd paid attention to Darfur.
(5) The Right Stuff - Airplanes, Astronauts, And Chuck Yeager. You can't ask for more.
(5) March of the Penguins - We don't know what penguins are looking for, but we know when they found it. And Morgan Freeman's narration makes anything sound interesting.
(5) The Motorcycle Diaries - How he became who he was. If it were a comic book, it would be issue zero and titled "The Origins of Che".
(5) * Man on Wire - About the man who tight-rope walked between the World Trade Towers. A documentary that actually captured the passion of the participants.
(5) Blue Planet: Seasonal Seas / Coral Seas - Because mother nature is nothing short of incredible, especially in HD.
(5) * Flame and Citron - Resistance spies in WWII. One of my favorite WWII movies. After the movie, read the history of the characters.
(4) The Yes Men Fix The World - These guys have balls. The horror and the corporate mindset of "Cash only matters, human life doesn't" will make you realize how lifeless, soulless, and corrupt many corporations are.
(3) Bugsy - Warren Beatty as the mentally unstable mobster that had the vision to craft the beginnings of Las Vegas. He was the man with the original vision.
(3) Serpico - A true story with the lead played by Al Pacino. Remember to fight the good fight.

Comedy:

(5) When Harry Met Sally - Comedy classic. Enough said.
(5) Charade - Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn, and some tightly written wit.
(5) An Evening with Kevin Smith - His career as a decent movie writer is long over, but he is a funny and excellent speaker.
(5) An Even with Kevin Smith 2 - Seriously, the man is funny enough to have a sequel of him just telling stories.
(5) My Blue Heaven - Steve Martin as an Italian mafia member. Probably my favorite comedy of his.
(5) * Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog - One of the funniest and most unique pieces filmed in the last ten years. Neil Patrick Harris rocks.
(5) The Importance of Being Earnest - Oscar Wilde is brilliant. "Cucumber sandwiches? Such reckless extravagance in one so young."
(5) The Royal Tenenbaums - Plenty of his subtle humor and subtle camera work coupled with obvious humor.
(4) Roxanne - One of Steve Martins best comedies. 20 of the best insults you can think of.
(4) Repo Man - By law, every real man must like this movie.
(4) Sunshine Cleaning - A quirky comedy similar to Little Miss Sunshine. Good filming, decent acting, and characters I loved.
(4) * Zombieland - The zombie angle is old, but this movie managed to take a fresh stance. Billy Murray and Woody Harrelson are two actors I always like.
(4) SNL The Best of Christopher Walken - Consistently the best guest on SNL. The man is a genius.
(3) * Splinterheads - Not amazing, but quirky and enjoyable. The grandfather might be the most entertaining part.
(3) America's Sweethearts - A goofy romantic comedy with John Cusack, Julia Roberts, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Christopher Walken, Hank Azaria, Billy Crystal, Seth Green, Rainn Wilson.
(3) So I Married an Axe Murderer - Campy, but enjoyable.
(3) Rushmore - Wes Anderson. Enough said.
(3) Risky Business - A decent comedy from a time when people liked Tom Cruise.
(1) Tomcats - I remember this being much funnier. (Mmmmmmm.... Jaime Pressly.)
(1) Fletch - It is a tragedy to sit through this, because it sucks. At one point in time movies like this were considered "funny".

Dark Comedy:

(5) Dr. Strangelove - The grandfather of dark comedies. The origin of my screen name.
(4) Raising Arizona - Probably the most quaky of the Coen brother movies, and the only good role Nicholas Cage ever had. A completely odd movie, but I love it.
(2) He Died with a Felafel in His Hand - Too long, too boring, and tried too hard. Go re-watch Trainspotting instead.
(2) Pineapple Express - Seth Rogen. Pot movie. Too long. No content. *yawn*. If you can see this on an airplane, read the SkyMall instead.

Comedians:

(5) Daniel Tosh: Completely Serious - One of my favorite comedians.
(5) Jim Gaffigan: Beyond the Pale - Great comedian.
(5) Brian Regan: Standing Up - Pointing out all of the weird stupidest we have.
(5) Demetri Marin. Perosn. - You can watch this on Netflix or on YouTube. You can tell he is smart and insightful.
(4) Zach Galifianakis: Live - A great comedian, but the film would be better without the segments of his twin brother.
(4) Amazing Johnathan: Wrong on Every Level - Even Gob can't beat these magic tricks.
(4) Christopher Titus: Love is Evol - I saw him perform this in real life. The subject matter isn't new or fresh, but he manages to make it his own.

Action:

(5) La Femme Nikita - Closer to a drama than an action movie, it is the one and only good "Nikita" style movie.
(5) Bullitt - Steve McQueen is a quiet cop in San Francisco doing his manly cop stuff. Great for what it is. I enjoyed the minimal dialogue.
(5) Fulltime Killer - Cantonese action movie. The top two assassins in the world have at it.
(5) Breaking News - Another Cantonese action movie. No American director could have made this.
(1) District B13 - French action movie. It is beyond predictable, cliched, and pointless.
(1) Boarding Gate - A French film. Everything in this movie is sub-par and boring.

Horror-ish, but not really:

(3) Teeth - Her vagina has teeth in. Do not put your penis in this. Completely unique. Has some graphic gore. Better than I expected.

Drama / Not a Comedy:

(5) * The Wrestler - Great acting by Mickey Rourke and Marisa Tomei.
(5) Syriana - Damn it, George Clooney. How are you good in everything? It shows what happens when you support people for oil and democracy rather than intelligence and politics.
(5) In the Mood For Love - Foreign. Excellent.
(5) Taxi Driver - How the hell had I never watched this before? De Niro can be creepy as hell.
(5) Amadeus - Apparently this movie pretty accurately portrays Mozart. It definitely captures his genius and how out matched his peers were, if you can ever call them peers.
(5) Donnie Darko - Completely unique, a nice untouched ending. If you prefer the extended release over the theatrical, you're a moron.
(5) * Oldboy - Awesome. In one fight scene you get to see on of the best cinemagraphic long shots ever filmed.
(5) * The Machinist - Christian Bale is an excellent actor when he needs to be. An interesting color palette and some great camera work.
(5) * The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - Not overly violent, but definitely brutal. See this version, the original Swedish version, before the American version comes out and takes a shit on a great piece of work.
(5) To Kill a Mockingbird - An amazing work of literature with an amazing movie to match it.
(5) Touch of Evil - Opens with a great long shot that builds some great suspense. The pissed off American detective is a great counter character. It is amazing how helpless women used to be portrayed. Someone straighten the woman up or slap her.
(5) * Pan's Labyrinth - The special effects are incredible, and the movie created a new genre: fairy tales for adults.
(5) Miller's Crossing - The Coen brothers take on mafia. An excellent double double cross. My favorite mafia movie after the Godfather
(5) L.A. Confidential - 1950's detectives, a gorgeous dame, a good whodunit.
(5) Letters from Iwo Jima - Everything Clint Eastwood directs turns to gold. He does it once again here.
(4) Rachel Getting Married - Anne Hathaway does a great job, but the plot wears a bit thin. The best part is the groom's family. I want to see a movie about them.
(4) Cashback - Tries to be deeper than it is, but it is well done. Some interesting camera angles.
(4) Romeo + Juliet - They did an excellent job staying true to the dialogue, but placing it all in a modern time period. Excellent sound track. I love the scene when they meet a the fish tank.
(4) Say Anything - John Cusack. You should know going in that it isn't a romantic comedy. It is just a story.
(3) The Grocer's Son - French. Not amazingly original, but I liked the pacing and the characters.
(3) Tell No One - French. Good, but 100% predictable.
(3) Lady Vengeance - Part of the Old Boy trilogy. Worth watching, but watch Old Boy instead if you haven't already.
(3) Fifteen Minutes - Arson investigator and some surprising twists of suspense. Parts of the plot are weak.
(3) Trade - About the sex trade industry. Makes you realize how messed up aspects of our world are. How can a human do this to another? A few scenes in particular stood out
(you'll know them when you see them).
(3) Point Break - A campy movie with Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze, but everyone needs to see it once.
(3) Claire Dolan - Slowly paced, but I liked it.
(1) Poison Ivy 3 - Terrible. But Jaime Pressly is hot and that helps.
(1) The Ten - Ten stories that all suck. Avoid at all costs.

Sci-Fi:

(5) Serenity - I loved Firefly, and I love Serenity. Joss Whedon has some balls for a few of the decisions. I expected this to be shit, and it wasn't.
(5) * A Scanner Darkly - Because Philip K. Dick is awesome. I like the style of animation, and there is some great brain fodder in here. It also has a good cast; or at least the kind of plot that allows this kind of cast to excel.
(5) The Terminator - There was a time when the Terminator franchise was good.
(5) Lord of the Rings: Return of the King: Extended Edition - Lord of the Rings is the only series where the extended version is worth watching. Until you've seen the extended versions, you will never realize how many details in the movies you missed.
(5) The Andromeda Strain - Technically this movie is rated G. Definitely an old school sci-fi movie, but well done. Be warned, it is a slow story.
(4) Outland - It is the movie "Highnoon" but on a colony located on a moon of Jupiter. Even in the future deep in outer space, shotguns are still the law.
(4) Back to the Future triology - Campy, but we all love'em.
(3) Primer - I give it three stars because they did this on very little budget and the script isn't bad. But I have all sorts of problems with movies that involve time travel. In the end, the movie doesn't leave you quenched in any way. Instead, you wonder what the hell happened to the writers.
(2) Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian - Too much story in too little time makes the entire thing feel hurried an not fleshed out enough. This movie tries to have more climaxes than a cheap coked up hooker on a porn set. Settle the fuck down, Hollywood.
(2) Starship Troopers - Generically filmed, but it does have a few hot babes and tons of evil alien insects and gore. You want to like this movie, but you can't really justify it.

Anime:

(5) * Ghost in the Shell - This movie broke a ton of artistic ground in anime and elevated great anime to a new height.
(5) Ninja Scroll - One of the first anime I ever saw and one of the coolest.
(4) Appleseed: Ex Machina - This is just Appleseed done in 2.0. The story is much more clear than the original anime. I love the opening fight scene.
(2) Ghost in the Shell 2.0 - I'm loyal to Masamune Shrirow, otherwise this would get 1 star for trying too hard. I'll leave it at that.

TV Series:

(5) * Arrested Development - All 3 Seasons - One of the best written and sharpest sitcoms to ever air in the States. On the other hand, I'm torn to say it, but 3 seasons might have been the right number.
(5) The Office - I didn't care much for the Office until I watched 5 or 6 episodes back to back. If you've never liked the show or watched it, try it in a large dose.
(5) 30 Rock - There isn't a single wasted word or moment in this entire sitcom.
(5) * Firefly - Space + Western = Awesome. The theme song is a horrible assault on your ears though.